Niveda began enjoying her day to day activities. The lack of college work lightened her mood. Every evening, as Praveena finished her daily assignments, Niveda sat with her, helping her out and sharing random conversations.
One day their History of Psychology professor, Mr Brown, questioned Niveda.
“You girl!” He exclaimed at her. He had quite a bad memory when it came to students’ names. “James told me you were doing some assignment for him,” he shook his head showing his disapproval. “What’s that about?” He peered hard at her through his round glasses.
Niveda stood up wondering what to say. She glanced at Praveena who looked back at her mutely, egging her to come up with a convincing lie.
“Er — ” Niveda began, “I’m doing a research on—er—I’m analyzing the greatest psychological experiments, and writing a paper suggesting alternative experimentation methods.” she smiled weakly.
“Experimental psychology, hmm…” Mr Brown nodded, wondering. “I thought it was the psychological effects of experiments on subjects?” He stared at her over the top of his glasses, as if he had caught her red handed doing something illegal, “that’s what James told me.” He added tilting his head to a side, a nasty grin playing on his lips.
“Er—yes, that too—Sir” Niveda added as an after thought. Praveena noticed her swallow hard. She couldn’t manage a lie without squirming with fear and insult.
“Oh, really?”
Anil stared at Mr Brown with contempt. “He doesn’t buy it,” he whispered to Praveena. She looked at Mr Brown who threw a crooked smile at Niveda.
“Sit.” He barked at her, who cowered with fear.
Praveena was a little astonished to see Niveda react the way she did. She would always speak back and bite anyone who dared to insult her. Praveena saw Niveda wasn’t the same anymore; she had changed a lot, giving in to others to stamp her down. ‘Could it be an effect of the drugs?’ She wondered.
After class, the three friends sat in the canteen discussing the event.
“It was so unlike you, Niveda.” Praveena voiced her thoughts. Anil turned to her disapprovingly. She shouldn’t have said that.
“I know,” Niveda said miserably. She hung her head. “I got scared. For some stupid reason. I feel like a coward. I couldn’t even face the old toad.”
Anil held her hand and smiled reassuringly. “No you’re not,” he said. “You’re very brave, you’re fighting this — this — thing, when the others are worrying about facing the exams. You’re braver than the whole lot of them.” He finished with a smile, and so did Praveena. Niveda, however, still looked unconvinced.
That night, Niveda sat on her bed, sleepless. Praveena lay awake as well. They were quiet, each lost in her own thoughts. Praveena had a sudden urge to speak to Ms Marrie. It had been long time since they had spoken with each other. Though Praveena had never accepted it, Ms Marrie had been a second mother to her. She remembered Ms Marrie telling her about getting married. She wondered if the marriage was over. She picked up her phone. She called Ms Marrie, but she disconnected the call when the phone had rung twice. ‘No,’ she thought. It was almost midnight, and Ms Marrie would be asleep now.
With a deep sigh, she put her phone away, and as she did, she saw Niveda meddling with her phone. She was messaging someone. ‘That’s odd,’ Praveena thought. She had never seen Niveda messaging anyone before. ‘but then again,’ her inner voice piped, ‘you had never seen her doing drugs either.’ She shut the voice down.
“Niveda?” she spoke softly a little uncertain.
“Hmm?” Niveda responded without looking up.
“You’re texting someone?” Praveena asked trying hard to keep the astonishment out of her voice.
Niveda looked up. Her eyes reflected confusion. “Yeah,” she snapped. Praveena remained silent. Then Niveda cast her phone away lazily and said in a plain voice, “I felt like talking to my mother.”
“Oh,” Praveen’s eyes widened. “Oh, that’s — that’s good.” She said. ‘What had she expected? That Niveda was messaging someone else?’ She should have known better than to suspect anything sinister.
“Sorry,” She apologized, “I thought — ” She began, but Niveda cut in with a simple, “Never mind.”
“So,” Praveena continued now a bit happier, “what did your Mom say?”
“She told me to go to hell,” Niveda shook her head in exasperation. Praveena couldn’t believe her ears. How could a mother say something like that? “And you know what I said?” Niveda continued, turning to face Praveena, her eyes sparkling. When Praveena shook her head, she said “I said, ‘I will’.”
Praveena stared at Niveda, now scared. ‘What’s got into her?’ She wondered.
“Come on now, Niveda — ” she began, but Niveda interrupted again.
“Don’t worry, I didn’t mean it.” Even in the dim light of the night lamp, Praveena could make out Niveda’s crooked smile.
Praveena didn’t say a thing for a while. “Okay,” she said at last. “Good night.”
“Good night. Sleep tight.” Niveda smiled widely, lay down on her bed, and turned over to the other side.
“Yeah…” Praveena trailed off as she pulled the sheet over her.
Praveena woke up early the next morning. It was Friday and she was expecting a good weekend. She turned to Niveda. Seeing her lying face down on the pillow, Praveena let her sleep a little more.
She left the bed and got ready. Twenty minutes later, she was combing her hair when she realized Niveda was still asleep. Putting her comb down, Praveena went over to wake Niveda up.
“Niveda?” she called tentatively touching her shoulder. That’s when she saw Niveda’s sheets wet. With ‘blood,’ she realized a split second later. Horrified, she turned Niveda over and saw her bleeding on her slashed arm. Paralyzed with shock, Praveena opened her mouth to shout for help, but no sound came out. She ran away from the room in panic and banged on the warden’s door nearby. Seeing a hysterical Praveena, pointing towards her room, the old lady led Praveena back to the room. There on the bed, they found Niveda’s body, lifeless.
National Blog Posting Month – Day 27
The Chaos Within 