Book review: I’m Not Okay and That’s Okay

Self-help books sound a bit patronising to me. Occasionally I find useful nuggets in the genre but because of its typical narrative style, I also don’t read too many self-help books. So when I first borrowed this book from my audio library, I didn’t know it was in the self-help category. It was an interesting title, and I like reading and learning about the macabre and mental illness so expected some sort of analysis of mental health. Alas, it wasn’t to be.

That’s on me. I don’t always read the blurbs before borrowing a book (I like the mystery) so I often find out about a book as I go along.

It wasn’t a total disaster. I gave this book a 3/5 on Goodreads, and my rating is a reflection of how I processed this book, and not of the content or the writing.

This isn’t the kind of book you read on the bus or listen on your run. I learnt that the hard way—I was mid-run when I finished a book. I’d already set up this book to play next so I did. Had to stop after about 10 minutes because it just wasn’t the kind of help I needed to finish my run.


This is the kind of book you have on your shelf and reach for whenever you’re having a rough time. If you have a nighttime routine that includes reflection or meditation, this might be a book you slot into that routine—a chapter a day would be more than enough. This is a slow read. It feels like a workbook with some strategies sprinkled in, and it gives you active time and space to work through said strategies. If that’s what you need in life right now, it’s a good little book.

It’s also an easy-to-read book. The language is simple and direct, which is important when you’re physically or mentally going through a difficult period. But it’s not a shallow read—it touches on some potentially confronting topics and ideas. But it doesn’t add to your cognitive load. It’s not an alternative to therapy, in other words. You’re still going to have to do the work yourself (whatever that looks like to you)—but the book can be a useful supplement.

On the other hand, parts of the book felt repetitive and rather obvious, for the lack of a better word. Most people will have come across some of the advice and strategies in the book. Sometimes, hearing the same advice from various sources can be reassuring, adding credence to the author’s expertise. Unfortunately, that can also make the book feel the same as others in the genre.

How does that make you feel?